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Tips with Drew and Nate: Thanksgiving

Nate Gentlesk, Assistant Editor

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Thanksgiving is right around the corner, but you probably don’t even know what it is! Fear not, because Drew and Nate are back again with hot new tips for the Thanksgiving Day festivals!

 

  1. Greet all your relatives with “Gobble Gobble!” for a cool Thanksgiving joke!
  2. Act out the story of the original Thanksgiving for your family for half an hour.
  3. Everyone loves canned beets.
  4. Unplug the TV when everyone is distracted trying to watch the big game—it’s family time!!
  5. The first person to eat 3 pounds of stuffing wins the Golden Riblet, so get eating!
  6. Butter yourself up and hide inside of the turkey for a Thanksgiving Day surprise!
  7. You can’t go wrong with a bowl of feathers.
  8. Remember to get a 6AM workout in before the Thanksgiving Day feast—focus on calves!
  9. Destroy a statue of Santa to show that Thanksgiving Day is the best fall holiday of all.
  10. Let everyone know who’s in charge, sit at the head of the table and wait for your subordinates to bring you your plate.

 

 

Special Holiday Bonus! 6 great Thanksgiving Day songs:

 

“Gobbletown” –Jeff Buckley

“Fun Turkey Boy” –Roger Staubach

“Symphony No. 5 in B-flat Major, K.22: I. Allegro” –Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

“Of the Genealogy of Morals, Essay 2 Sections 16-25” –Friedrich Nietzsche

“It’s Called Stuffing and Yams, Don’t You Know Anything?” –Johann Pachelbel

“Trotting Around the Turkey Table” –Drew Donathan

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Tips with Drew and Nate: Thanksgiving